A little distraction

I am tired for the doom and gloom posts recently. I am simply exhausted and need a break from all the pain in my heart. I spend so much time trying to figure out what I did that was so wrong to have caused this pain and I am simply getting nowhere!

It has been such a long time since I have posted anything about the kids that I thought I would celebrate them.

For those that have read this blog since I started can you believe that my gorgeous boy Jordy will be 6 years old in 4 days?

The road of fertility was long and hard and I remember every step I took, I am still sometimes amazed that I survived with my sanity intact!

Jordy is now in Primary school and I can’t be any prouder of my big boy.  I see so much of myself in my son, he is kind hearted and thoughtful. I would not be able to leave the house in the mornings without his support. I also see that he suffers from low self-esteem and is a sensitive boy.  This is just like me and I wish I had a magic wand that would waive the pain away from his big beautiful heart!

Rylie is our cheeky monkey and the clown of the family.  He is makes us laugh so, he reminds me so much of my younger brother.  Rylie rarely shows me affection he will cuddle into me but opening showing that he cares is something my “brown eyed baba” is not comfortable with.  He hides his true self with is silliness, he is extremely sensitive but tries to be a man and hide it.  All it takes is a look from me or a touch on his shoulder when he is upset and he will cry silently. We know when is something is really bothering him when is cries silently.

Lilly, oh how blessed am I to have daughter like my Lil.  It is often commented but people in my life that she is a splitting image of me when I was young.  We recently caught up with my child hood friend that knew me since I was 8 and he said Lilly was me.  She is not a Daddy’s girl at all, she is all mine and such a beautiful soul.  She is caring, loving, outgoing and so self assured that it blows my mind.  She knows what she wants and will tell you in her softly spoken voice “Mummy do my hair again, I am still not pretty yet”.

I am truly blessed to have these little people in my life.

Dear universe thankyou for the beautiful gifts of my children and for teaching me the harshness of infertility.